Some of you will have seen on sm that Zoe Ball is undertaking a bike ride as part of Sport Relief (March 17th – 23rd). You may have even have caught the interviews with her on BBC Breakfast and The One Show (17 mins in) a few days ago. It’s great that Sport Relief is focusing on mental health this time around. There’s the cycling challenge (as yet unquantified) but she will also be visiting various projects across the country working to improve things for those people dealing with a range of MH issues.

What struck me, looking through some of the comments to her on sm after the broadcasts was the genuine kindness and willingness to share advice that was coming from the cycling community. It’s something like that which I experienced when I started to become involved in cycling in 2003. Also the bit about doing an undignified, slow-motion 90-deg *flump* onto the tarmac during the period when you first embark on cleat usage. Mine was near Turnpike Lane in North London. At traffic lights. With four lanes of stationary traffic behind me.

In 2010 a number of well-known faces tag-teamed JOGLE (John O’Groats to Land’s End) during one of the bitterest and longest winters I remember in a long time. By April even those non-SAD sufferers were going spare at the lack of sunshine. I remember being impressed at those celebs who were cycling newbies and, again, it brought me back to my earlier experiences. The cleats, first time using cycling shorts, learning about chamois cream (or minty arse lard, if you will). Then feeling a bit frisky moving onto the bib-shorts stage… even a skinsuit. I love a bib-short, me… but I digress. I remember eagerly accepting top tips from those who had lots of cycling knowledge to share. John Mullineaux some of you will know from racing in London, the South-East, and beyond. His cobble-riding tips got me through my Paris-Roubaix Randonnee a decade ago (raised bars, cross tops). Gary MacGowan of Dulwich Paragon CC had lots of great pointers re long-distance riding when I first did Dunwich Dynamo (cut your toenails beforehand!).

I found there to be a particular warmth and encouragement to be had from other cyclists. Also sharing of information, comparing of experiences. I think Zoe Ball will get all the advice she needs (and probably much, much more!).

I confess I have an ulterior motive for writing a bit about Sport Relief. In early December I followed up a tweet from Anxiety UK to get in contact with a production company who were looking to interview people anxiety for a Beeb Sport Relief documentary. I, media whore that I am, offered my services. About 15 or so of us were asked the same questions – I think they’ll intercut our responses throughout the programme, around the footage of a celeb and her personal experience of anxiety. Not sure how much air time will be yours truly but look out for the one with the red glasses.

I’ve probably done the same amount of hours on a turbo trainer in the last month or so than I have on the bike. There have been a couple of weekends that didn’t feature a ride at all. I did push myself to go to the gym, partly in order to not feel guilty about not doing anything at all but didn’t use the bikes there either. Thought I’d do something about my tiny cyclist T-Rex arms. Mat work, weights, and treadmill basically. I’ve been attempting running, after not having run since my schooldays (I was crap at running then) and I’ve managed to get to a point where a Park Run *might* be feasible. What I’ve also discovered is that if you go to the gym and do a HIIT turbo session on the same day your HR gets very, very high and it’s possible to feel a rather queasy at the end. Seeing Zoe Ball out training in the wind and rain did make me feel a bit of a weed for skipping what would have been a very wet, cold ride recently for me in Kent recently. Only a bit, though.

Next blog post coming up shortly – A Bikes&Brains evening at Rapha Manchester coming up on 22nd February! Plans a-foot for another one in London and one in Bristol too in the near future…

I’d be surprised if there is anyone out there who returns to work in the New Year with a bounce in their step, and beaming from ear to ear. If you do… take it elsewhere yer massive weirdo.

As I’ve got older I’ve noticed that the change in seasons affect me more. The darker evenings from late October and then the darker mornings. Up to the end of the year it isn’t so bad – various high days and holidays to look forward to that break things up a bit to or distract from winter grey. Unless socialising and Xmas isn’t your thing. January and February can be particularly tough, sometimes March too but then some colour does start to return to the landscape and the hushed whisperings of the oncoming spring can detected.

I presume that the Time to Talk day was set for the beginning of February very deliberately – this year it falls on Feb 1st. World Mental Health Day in October, Time to Talk Day in February, and Mental Health Awareness Week in May bridge what can be a challenging time for many. Having said that, they haven’t been events that I have engaged with much on a personal level as I’m usually involved on a professional level. When the relevance of these initiatives isn’t easily compartmentalised… therein lies a bit of an issue (but that is a blog post of its own!).

A cup of tea and a chat can get things started. Time to Talk has a simplicity to it, an accessibility. I like that. For the same reasons I think that Blackdog CC is a great idea. Those of you who attended the Look Mum No Hands evening or listened to the Wheelsuckers podcast will recall Roann Ghosh talking about the club. It starts with a sticker (and who doesn’t like stickers, right?!). A subtle yet clear signifier that it’s ok to talk to someone about depression. Also, as Roann mentioned, it can be easier to talk when side by side rather than face to face. You’re less exposed. I think many people can find talking about difficult subjects when you have another task to hand, be it riding or mechanic-ing.

Anxiety can get in the way of even these seemingly simple beginnings. Things is, about anxiety, the Fear of the What-If is almost always way worse than the action or activity itself. And then you realise how much cognitive wherewithal you’ve used up worrying about the possible outcomes of a decision. It can be exhausting. Being able to identify and catch yourself when you’re doing this is one thing, modifying your thinking is quite another.

It’s at this point I come to the conclusion that if I was talking to you I would have got stuck in a bit of a verbal cul-de-sac. I’m not sure I meant to write about this but here I am.

Anyway, as mentioned before, I use turbo sessions to keep my fitness and energy levels up during the cold, grey weeks. The last three years I’ve been on a club training camp at the beginning of February for a week. It’s really helped to break up the post-Xmas/Long Time ‘Til Easter period. This year, for a change, I’ve plumped for a camp a bit later on. I have been a bit concerned about whether I made the right decision though I am looking forward to the more settled weather in the Costa Blanca in April. There are some good climbs to be had inland from Calpe, orange groves a-plenty, and a promise of the spa in the basement of the hotel we’ll stay in. Women riders – if you fancy joining me 14-21 April then take a look at the details here: Elite Cycling Training Camps . I booked my flights today in a fit of commitment and it feels good to have the week to look forward to. Particularly given the talking to I had to give myself this morning to get out of bed and ride. There’ll be several group rides in Spain so whether you want hard miles for race prep, or just want to get a few miles in the legs in warm climes you will be catered for. I’m not planning to be chewing the bars all round south-east Spain – the group I usually ride in even has a coffee stop. That’s how I roll.